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She was his shadow, his secret, his everything... until he chose another. Freya Forest, the Alpha’s loyal shadow guardian, was discarded the moment Zander Thorne bound himself to his cruel Luna-elect. Betrayed, broken, and left for dead by the Silver Thorns, she awakens to her true identity: the last Moon Healer. Now she rises from the ashes. Ruthless. Unstoppable. And when Alpha Zander comes crawling back, begging for her forgiveness and her love? She will give him only one thing: justice. Twenty minutes ago, Zander's hands had been worship and fire against my skin. His mouth had traced paths along my throat. His fingers had gripped my hips with raw hunger, and when I arched beneath him, he growled my name in that rough, desperate voice that always made my wolf tremble. "Freya," he breathed against my ear. "God, the way you feel..." His Alpha scent wrapped around me like silk chains, making my body answer him before my mind could stop it. When he buried his face in my neck and breathed in my scent like he needed it to survive, I let myself believe this was real. That I was more than his personal guard. More than his weapon. More than the woman he wanted only when no one was watching. But now, the heat was gone. Now I knelt on the cold marble floor, my knees already numb from the position I had held for far too long. The silk sheets behind me were still warm, still carrying the musky scent of what we had just done, but Alpha Zander Thorne was already pulling on his shirt as if nothing had happened. As if the past year of nights like this one meant absolutely nothing. "Ten days, Freya." His voice was steady, almost businesslike. The same tone he used when giving me assassination orders. "The Luna ceremony is in ten days. After that, you go back to being my personal guard. Nothing more." Nothing more. The words hit like silver bullets, but I kept my face blank. Years of training had taught me to hide pain better than most Omegas hide their heat cycles. "Of course, Alpha." I bowed my head lower, letting my dark hair fall forward to hide whatever expression might have leaked through. "Congratulations on your upcoming bonding with Luna Susanna." He paused in buttoning his shirt, and for a moment—just a moment. But it was gone so fast I might have imagined it. "She's arriving from the Northern Territory tomorrow," he continued, completely ignoring the tremor in my voice. "I trust you'll ensure her safety during her stay. Along with your other duties." Other duties. Right. Like I had spent the last twelve months being his secret bedwarmer under the guise of "practice for the woman he planned to marry." Like I had let him use my body as a practice partner he'd use on the woman he actually wanted to bond with. "Of course." I forced the word out through gritted teeth. Alpha Zander finished dressing and moved toward the door, then stopped. "Freya." My heart did something stupid and hopeful in my ch//est. "Yes, Alpha?" "Clean up in here before you leave. I don't want any trace of... this." He gestured vaguely at the rumpled bed, at me still kneeling half-n@ked on his floor. "Susan can't know." And there it was. The final nail in the coffin of whatever pathetic fantasy I'd been nurturing. "Of course not." I kept my voice steady even as something inside me cracked clean in half. "No one will ever know, Alpha. You have my word." He nodded once, sharp and final, then left without looking back. I stayed kneeling until I heard his footsteps fade down the corridor, until I was sure he was really gone. Only then did I allow myself to breathe, to feel the full weight of what had just happened crushing down on my ch//est. It's over. The thought should have brought relief. Instead, it just made me feel hollow, like someone had scooped out everything important and left me with nothing but an empty shell wearing Freya Forest's face. I forced myself to stand on shaking legs and began mechanically straightening the room. Smoothing wrinkled sheets. Picking up discarded clothing. Erasing every trace of the Omega who'd been foolish enough to think an Alpha like Zander Thorne could ever want more than her body. But as I worked, memories kept flooding back, each one a fresh knife twist in an already gaping wound. Seven years old, half-frozen in a snowdrift on the outskirts of the Silvercrest Pack's territory. A teenage Alpha with kind eyes pulling off his coat to wrap around my shivering form. "What's your name, little wolf?" "I... I don't remember." "Then we'll give you a new one. How about Freya? Because you're tough enough to survive the cold." That had been my first glimpse of Zander—not the cold, calculating Alpha he'd become, but a boy who'd seen a dying Omega pup and couldn't walk away. He'd brought me back to the pack house, convinced his father to let him keep me as a personal guard in training. For ten years, he'd been my whole world. My savior, my trainer, my pack leader, my everything. I'd learned to fight for him, to kill for him, to disappear into the shadows so completely that most wolves forgot I existed. I'd been so careful to hide my feelings, to never let him see how his rare smiles made my heart race or how his scent could calm me from the worst nightmares. I'd been the perfect weapon, the invisible guard, content to love him from the shadows because that was all an Omega like me could ever hope for. Until that night a year ago. He'd been in pre-rut, stressed from territorial disputes and pack elders' increasing pressure to choose a Luna. I'd been reporting on a successful mission when his control snapped. One moment I was standing at attention, the next I was pinned against his office wall with his mouth on mine and his hands tearing at my clothes. "I need..." he'd growled against my throat, his canines already extended. "Fuck, Freya, I need to know how to please Susanna Voss. Help me learn." Even then, he had told me the truth. But I had loved him too much to hear it. So I said yes. For twelve months, I'd told myself it meant something. That the way he held me afterward, the gentle touches when he thought I was sleeping, the time he'd pulled me close during a thunderstorm and whispered comfort against my hair—it all meant something more than practice. I had mistaken that for tenderness. Maybe it was tenderness. Maybe that was the cruelest part. By the time I finished cleaning, the room looked untouched. The sheets were smooth. The air had begun to clear. Soon, there would be no sign that I had ever been here. Exactly how he wanted it. I stepped into the hallway and closed the door behind me. The soft click echoed through my ch//est with a finality I could not ignore. Three days ago, I had received intel that changed everything. A border informant had been asking questions about me—about my origins, my bloodline, and why a seven-year-old Omega had been found alone in the wilderness with no memory of her past. For years, I assumed I was nobody. But maybe someone out there knew differently. Maybe there was a life beyond these walls. A truth beyond the name Zander had given me. A future where I was not someone's secret, someone's weapon, or someone's practice for the woman he truly wanted. If that was true—if I really did have family, a pack, a life beyond these walls—then maybe it was time to stop clinging to a man who would never want me as more than a training tool. I needed to leave Alpha Zander. I made my way through the silent corridors to the guard quarters, my bare feet soundless on the stone floors. The other pack members were either on patrol or asleep, which suited my purposes perfectly. I needed to speak with Beta Morrison privately. I found him in his office, still awake despite the late hour. He looked up when I knocked, his weathered face creasing into a frown at my expression. "Freya? What's wrong?" I stepped inside and closed the door, then took a breath that felt like swallowing glass. "I want to request release from the Silvercrest Pack." The words hung in the air between us like a death sentence. Beta Morrison's eyebrows shot toward his hairline. "Release? Freya, you're one of our best assets. The Alpha depends on you. What's brought this on?" The Alpha depends on me. Right. For killing his enemies and warming his bed until his real Luna arrived. "Personal reasons," I said carefully. "There are... opportunities I need to explore. Outside the pack." "Opportunities?" Morrison leaned back in his chair, studying me with sharp eyes that had seen too much to be easily fooled. "This wouldn't have anything to do with the upcoming Luna ceremony, would it?" My poker face must have slipped for just a second, because his expression softened with something that might have been sympathy. "Ah, he11." He rubbed his forehead. "I wondered when this would come to a head. How long?" "How long what?" "How long have you been in love with our Alpha?" The question hit me like a physical blow. I opened my mouth to deny it, but Beta Morrison held up a hand. "Don't bother lying. I've been watching you watch him for years. And I've seen the way you've been moving lately—like a puppy with a fresh wound she's trying to hide." I closed my eyes, suddenly exhausted. "Does it matter how long?" "It matters because walking away from your pack, from everything you've known for ten years—that's not a decision you make lightly. Especially not for a man who's too blind to see what's right in front of him." "He sees plenty," I said bitterly. "He just doesn't want it permanently." Morrison was quiet for a long moment. When he spoke again, his voice was gentler than I'd ever heard it. "You know I can't just let you go. You're bound to this pack by blood oath. I'd need the Alpha's permission to release you." My heart sank. Of course it wouldn't be that simple. Nothing ever was. "Then I'll ask him," I said, trying to sound more confident than I felt. "And if he says no?" I met Beta Morrison's eyes steadily. "Then I'll ask again. And again. Until he gets tired of hearing it and lets me go just to shut me up." Beta Morrison actually smiled at that. "You know what? I think you might just be stubborn enough to wear him down." His expression grew serious again. "But Freya... are you sure about this? Once you leave, there's no coming back. The Alpha doesn't forgive betrayal, even the soft kind." Betrayal. As if wanting more than scraps from his table was somehow treacherous. "I'm sure," I lied. "Even if it means enduring the cruelest punishment to leave?" Beta Morrison's voice dropped lower. "You might not survive the pain before you make it out of the pack." Any wolf who tried to sever their bond with the pack faced a punishment known as the exile trial — a ritual meant to mark and punish betrayal. "I'm sure." My voice came out steadier than I felt. "When?" Morrison consulted the ceremonial calendar, his weathered face grim. "Seven days from now. " He paused, something shifting in his expression. "That's... that's the same morning as the Alpha's bonding ceremony." Of course it was. The universe apparently had a twisted sense of humor. "Perfect," I said, surprised by how bitter I sounded. "Everyone will be too busy celebrating to notice one broken guard getting what she deserves." "Freya—" "It's better this way." I cut him off before he could say something that might crack my resolve. "Clean break. No drama. Just... gone." Morrison studied me for a long moment, then nodded slowly. "Alright. But until then, you're still bound to protect this pack. That includes the future Luna." Right. Susanna. The she-wolf who would soon wear the title I'd never even dared dream of claiming. "Understood, Beta." Three hours later, I crouched in the shadows of the oak grove overlooking Moon Lake, watching Zander guide Susanna's hand as she attempted to sketch the landscape. "Like this?" Her laugh was musical, deliberately charming. The kind of laugh that made Alphas want to move mountains just to hear it again. "Exactly like that." Zander's voice was warm, indulgent. The voice of a male completely besotted with his chosen female. "You're a natural artist, love." Love. The endearment hit me like a physical blow. In all our months together, he'd never called me anything but my name. Usually he didn't even manage that—just growled commands against my skin or breathed curses when I drove him past the edge of control. I should have left. I should have given them their perfect little moment by the lake and saved myself the pain of watching it. But I stayed. Maybe because some foolish part of me still needed to see it clearly. Maybe because pain was easier to bear when it finally stopped pretending to be hope. Zander tucked a strand of Susanna's golden hair behind her ear. “It's already perfect,” he said. “Just like you.” My fingers curled against the bark beside me. Now I understood. He knew how to be soft. He knew how to speak gently, how to look at a woman as if she mattered, how to make a simple touch feel like a promise. He had simply never chosen to do those things for me. Before I could force myself to look away, a pack soldier hurried into the grove. "Alpha," the pack soldier called out. "Urgent dispatch from the eastern border." Zander's entire demeanor shifted, "What's the situation?" "Rogue activity, sir. They've been testing our defenses for the past week. Beta Morrison requests your immediate presence." Zander was already standing. "How long?" "Could be several hours, Alpha. Possibly overnight if negotiations are required." His jaw tightened. His gaze moved to Susanna, who immediately placed one delicate hand against her throat, looking concerned in exactly the right way. "I hate to leave you so soon after your arrival," he said, taking her hand in his. "Duty comes first," she replied softly. "I understand completely." Her face was gentle. Her voice was perfect. But from where I stood in the shadows, I caught the faintest flash of annoyance in her scent before she buried it beneath sweetness again. Zander lifted her hand and kissed her knuckles. “I'll have one of my guardians escort you back to your quarters. Freya is extremely capable. You'll be safe with her.” My blood went cold. “Freya?” Susanna repeated, her voice still honey-sweet. “My personal personal guard,” Zander said. “She's been with me for ten years. Completely trustworthy.” Then he was gone, shifting into his massive black wolf form and disappearing into the forest. For exactly thirty seconds, Susanna maintained her sweet, helpless act. Then, the moment Zander's scent faded completely from the clearing, her entire demeanor shifted like a mask being ripped away. Finally, she stood and smoothed her skirts. "Freya?" she called sweetly. "I know you're there. Your Alpha asked you to escort me, didn't he?" Shit. I stepped out of the shadows, falling into the neutral stance I used when on guard duty. "Luna Susanna. Sorry for keeping you waiting." She studied me with those green eyes, taking in everything from my practical leather clothing to the weapons I wore as naturally as jewelry. When she smiled, it didn't reach her eyes. "So you're the famous Freya. Zander speaks of you often." I doubt that. "I'm here to ensure your safety, Luna." "How wonderful." She started walking toward the pack house, her movements graceful and deliberately slow. "Tell me, how long have you been... serving... my future mate?" "Ten years. How devoted." We'd reached the main entrance, but instead of heading toward the guest quarters, Susanna stopped. "Actually, I find myself quite thirsty. Would you mind terribly escorting me to the kitchens first?" It wasn't really a question. "Of course, Luna." The kitchens were largely empty at this time of day, most of the staff preparing for the evening meal in other parts of the complex. Susanna moved through the space like she owned it, finally settling herself delicately in a chair near the large hearth. Where a coal fire bvrned hot and bright. "You know," she said conversationally, "I've heard so much about the loyalty of Zander's guards. How they'd do anything for their Alpha. Suffer any hardship." I didn't like where this was going. "We serve the pack, Luna." "The pack. Yes." She studied her perfectly manicured nails. "But I'll be Luna soon. Which means you'll be serving me as well." "Of course." "I'm so glad you understand." Susanna's smile was sharp as winter Freya. "Because I have a small concern. You see, I know about ambitious Omegas who get... ideas... about their place in the hierarchy. Who forget that proximity to an Alpha doesn't make them special." My jaw clenched despite my best efforts. "I'm not sure what you're implying, Luna." "Oh, I think you do." Susanna stood, moving closer to where I stood at attention. "You see, I have an excellent sense of smell. And right now, you absolutely reek of my future mate." The words hit like a physical blow, but I forced myself to remain still. "So here's what's going to happen," she continued, her voice never losing its sweet tone. "You're going to kneel in front of that fireplace and show me exactly how sorry you are for overstepping your bounds. And you're going to stay there until I'm satisfied that you understand your place." “Luna—” “That wasn't a request.” Her voice cracked through the room like a whip. “Kneel.” The command hit my wolf like a silver chain, but I resisted. "I take orders from Alpha Zander, not—" "Not from his Luna?" Susanna's eyes flashed dangerously. "How interesting. I'll be sure to mention your insubordination when he returns. I'm sure he'll be fascinated to hear how his 'trustworthy' guard refused to obey his mate." The threat was clear. She would twist this into insubordination. She would make me look jealous, unstable, dangerous. And Zander, with his perfect Luna standing beside him, would believe what suited him best. Slowly, fighting every instinct I had, I sank to my knees in front of the blazing hearth. "Closer," Susanna ordered. "I want you to really feel it." I moved forward until the heat rolled over my face and arms. It was close enough to sting, close enough to make the leather at my sleeves warm almost immediately. "Perfect." Susanna settled back in her chair, looking supremely satisfied. "Now we wait. And while we do, why don't you tell me all about your... service... to my mate?" I said nothing. That only made her smile wider. An hour later, my knees felt raw against the stone floor, and sweat had soaked through the back of my shirt. The heat from the fire crawled over my skin in waves, turning every breath dry and painful. The smell of singed leather rose around me, followed by something sharper when the skin along my arms began to bvrn. Susanna seemed to find it pleasant. “You know,” she said lazily, examining her nails again, “I think you're finally starting to understand. An Alpha's wh0re has no place in a proper pack. Once Zander and I are mated, I'll make sure you're transferred somewhere more suitable.” I kept my mouth shut. Speaking would only give her more to use. “Nothing to say?” she asked. “Good. I was worried you might be one of those delusional Omegas who thinks being used makes her special.” My fingers curled against my thighs, but I forced them still. At last, Susanna rose and smoothed her skirts. “I think we understand each other now. You may go.” I tried to stand and nearly collapsed when my knees refused to hold me. Pain shot up my legs, sharp enough to blur my vision for a second, but I bit the inside of my cheek and forced myself upright. I would not crawl in front of her. I bowed stiffly. “As you wish, Luna.” By the time I reached my quarters in the guard barracks, fever was already creeping through me. The bvrns were worse than I had thought, and without proper treatment, infection was a real risk. But the pack medic would ask questions I couldn't answer, and Beta Morrison would want to know why I looked like I'd been used as kindling. I collapsed on my narrow bed, shivering despite the heat radiating from my injuries. My emergency medical kit had basic supplies, but nothing strong enough for bvrns this severe. Still, I cleaned what I could with shaking hands. This is fine, I told myself as the room began to tilt. In a few days, none of this will matter anyway I woke to the sensation of cool hands on my fevered skin. For a moment, I thought I was dreaming. The touch was gentle, professional, spreading something soothing over the worst of my bvrns. I tried to speak, to move, but my body felt like it was made of lead. The fever had me in its grip, making everything hazy and strange. "Shh," a familiar voice murmured. "Don't try to move. You're bvrning up." Strong hands rolled me carefully onto my stomach, and I felt my shirt being lifted away from the worst bvrns. There was a sharp intake of breath. "Fuck, Freya. What did you do to yourself?" I didn't do anything, I wanted to say. Your precious Luna did this. She marked her territory and made sure I knew exactly where I stood. But the words wouldn't come. Instead, I felt the blessed relief of healing salve being applied to my injuries, followed by the strange tingling sensation that meant Zander was using his Alpha strength to accelerate my healing. "This should help with the infection," he said quietly, his voice closer now. "But these bvrns are severe. What happened?" I managed to force my eyes open, blinking away the fever haze until his face came into focus. He was kneeling beside my bed, his expression tight with concern that looked almost genuine. "Training accident," I whispered, the lie scraping my throat raw. Zander's eyes narrowed. "Training accident? Freya, these are fire bvrns. Severe ones." "Slipped during knife work," I improvised. "Fell into a torch bracket." Patient. He wanted me to be patient while his future Luna t0rtured me for sport. "After the bonding ceremony," he said, his voice dropping to that intimate tone I knew too well, "after everything settles down, I'll reassign you back to my personal detail. Things will go back to normal." Normal. As if there was anything normal about this situation. As if I'd still be here after the ceremony to resume whatever twisted relationship he thought we had. "Of course, Alpha," I managed. "Whatever you need." "Get some rest. You'll need your strength." Zander said. He was almost to the door when I found my voice again. "Alpha Zander?" He stopped. "She's lucky," I said quietly. "To have someone who cares about her happiness so much." For a long moment, he didn't move. Then, without turning around, he said, "So was I." The door closed behind him with a soft click, leaving me alone with the scent of healing salve. The next morning, I woke to a bucket of ice water being dumped over my head. I shot upright, gasping and sputtering, my injuries screaming in protest as the frigid water hit my bvrns. A young omega maid stood beside my bed, holding an empty bucket and wearing an expression of smug satisfaction. "Luna Susanna's orders," she announced. "You're to be ready for guard duty in ten minutes." I wiped water from my eyes, trying to process what had just happened. "guard duty doesn't start until—" "Luna Susanna's guard duty starts when she says it does." The maid set the bucket down with a loud clang. "She's waiting in the east courtyard. Don't keep her waiting longer than you already have." The omega swept out, leaving me dripping and shivering in my soaked bedding. Every instinct I had screamed that this was deliberate humiliation, but I forced myself to get moving. The faster I dressed, the faster I could get through whatever fresh he11 Susanna had planned. I made it to the east courtyard in eight minutes, my damp hair still clinging to my neck and my leather jacket squelching with each step. Susanna was waiting under the covered walkway, wrapped in an elegant fur-lined cloak that probably cost more than I made in a year. "There you are," she said brightly. "I was beginning to think you'd decided to sleep in." "Sorry, Luna. I wasn't informed of the schedule change." "Oh, didn't I mention? I prefer to start my days early. Fresh air and exercise, you know." She gestured toward the open courtyard, where fresh snow had fallen during the night. "I thought I'd take a walk. You can stand guard while I walk." Something cold settled in my stomach that had nothing to do with my wet clothes. "Of course, my lady." "Wonderful. Take position by the fountain, would you? I want you where I can see you." The fountain was in the center of the courtyard, completely exposed to the elements. Snow was still falling in fat, lazy flakes that would soak through my already damp clothing in minutes. But I took my position without complaint, settling into the alert stance that had been drilled into me since childhood. Feet apart, hands clasped behind my back, eyes scanning for threats that we both knew didn't exist. Susanna began her "walk," which consisted mainly of pacing along the covered walkway while I stood in the falling snow. Every few minutes, she'd call out some observation about the weather or the architecture, clearly expecting responses that I provided in clipped, professional tones. After an hour, I was soaked to the skin and shivering hard enough that my teeth chattered. My bvrns had reopened under the wet leather, and I could feel blood seeping through my shirt. "My, you look cold," Susanna observed, her voice dripping with false concern. "Perhaps next time you'll remember to dress more appropriately for the weather." "Yes, Luna." "I think that's enough fresh air for today." She pulled her cloak tighter around herself, making a show of warming her hands. "But first, I find myself in need of some grooming assistance. My usual maid is feeling poorly." Of course she is. "I'm not trained in personal service, Luna." I said carefully. Susanna's eyes flashed. "Are you refusing to follow my orders?" "No, Luna. I'm simply explaining that I lack the necessary skills—" "Then you'll learn quickly, won't you?" She was already heading toward the pack house. "My chambers. Now."